Jasper Journal

David Axelrod, the ventriloquist behind most  of Obama’s speeches, today declared that last week’s tea party protests against the president were unhealthy. Wow, I never guessed health care would enter into this aspect of our lives, but these democrats really care for us. Really? I guess the continuous,vicious protests against President Bush were in a different vein and therefore, not unhealthy. Maybe they were even good for the system? 

The real issue here is that these people don’t like criticism period. They can dish it out, but God help us if it is directed at them. Perhaps a bit more humble pie in the diets of these bloated bureaucrats would be in order.

 And speaking of unhealthy, it will be interesting to hear the reaction of our dear leader on the occasion of the 4/20 drug protests discussed in the previous article.  How will someone who admittedly used pot and blow be able to back up the men and women  in law enforcement who risk their lives day in and day out to protect our children from illegal drugs? What will be the reaction of our academic institutions to these mass drug ins? Too bad Timothy Leary isnt around anymore… but even in his wildest LSD haze he would never believe what is happening.  Stay tuned.

Today I am very pleased to post a report from my correspondent in the Peoples Republic of Boulder Colorado . For security sake, my correspondent must remain nameless.  This will be one of a number of reports from the conservative underground in Boulder. Thank you for the update !

Ah Boulder, the land of equality. Where regular residents of Boulder can

get a good meal during the day, and night-dwelling stoners can get equally quality meal throughout the early morning hours. As a Republican in Boulder, certain amusingly interesting situations have become more noticeable. For instance, how there was an absolutely hysterical reaction from the liberals/tree huggers/hippies in regards to a pro-life display that was recently posted on CU campus. Signs and tables set up around the display of graphic abortion photos read, “Should graphic photos be displayed in public”. They were literally up in arms, and even classrooms were disrupted by talk of these “unnecessary and disgusting photos”. However, just last week, I found myself in the UMC (the Student Union) for a quick lunch break between classes. While trying to enjoy my “El Cannibal” burrito, I was confronted with some disturbing imagery and audio… a vegan organization from Boulder set up a table in the UMC and was showing videotapes from slaughterhouses, complete with gag-invoking sounds and visuals. So, why is it that use of this “shock” graphic almost encouraged by fellow students to make a point about non-vegans, but photos of truly tragic situations like abortion cannot be tolerated on such a “peaceful campus”? But onto the true point of this article: 4.20.

 

For those who don’t know, 4.20 stands for the date April 20^th, AKA National Pot-Smoking Day. Every year, stoners celebrate the one day of the year where they can come together and dope it up for the cause of the legalization of marijuana. If there was a Mecca for 4.20, Boulder would be it. In fact, Farrand Field (located on CU Campus) is infamous for being flooded by pot-smokers every year on 4.20 who share the mentality that if enough people break the law at once, it’s okay. But I stray off-topic.

 

The entire city of Bouldercelebrates 4.20 like a national holiday. One local eatery is even giving out free 4.20 T-shirts with every meal purchase! In various academic buildings around campus, there are flyers advertising 4.20 informational seminars, complete with the quote, “Obama would be there, but he’s busy”. Cute, huh? The final cherry on top of the absurdity that is Boulder: some CU professors even give their students a heads up that on 4.20, they have a trippy lesson planned for those students who are planning to come to class high. You know, to keep them interested. Good thing your tax dollars fund this public university, huh?

 

Now I don’t mean to say that CU is a bad university. One can acquire a fantastic education here, and even achieve degrees that are not offered at any other universities in Colorado. But no wonder the Denver court system ruled in favor of a liar like Ward Churchill. When a university cannot stand for basic, ethical values like the obedience and enforcement of national drug laws, how can anyone believe that CU stands for moral values like the importance of honesty among its faculty members?

 

Granted, 4.20 is an amusing “holiday” for those who choose to abide by the law and not smoke marijuana. One can watch perfectly intelligent individuals cash in their brain cells (and sperm count in men’s cases) for a quick high. Now a fellow student did bring up an interesting point that there might be some merit to the basic idea behind 4.20. The student noted that IF 4.20 focused on thoughtful, intelligent debate about why marijuana should or should not remain illegal, the US would be a better place because of it. I can see that, really I can. But unfortunately, 4.20 is actually just one day a year that pot-smokers can come together to, for lack of a better phrase, get stupid.

 

So, if you want a vacation from the norm (the hard-working, law-abiding lifestyle of average Americans), take a trip up to the People’s Republic of Boulder on April 20^th. It’s an experience you won’t soon forget.

 

 

-BoulderCorrespondent,

Jasper Journal